The very last post i will write about you.
Like my every other letter, I start with; I love you.
Probably more than i've ever loved anyone. nor anyone ever will. Its hard to forget those tiny moments we had. The candies you bought and the nonsense we do. I guess i've been stuck with you for so long, we've almost been everywhere together.
So much so that it's asphyxiating with every step i take. When i got together with you, i was mentally prepared for the emotional pain that i will go through. and it has been hell of a ride. But you do it so well the way you play my heart out on a string it's impossible not to be so madly in love with you.
The last time i held you in my arms i hated life for being so cruel. To have given me someone so perfect for me and yet not the honor to keep him by my side. Then our tears started to feed the ache and everything just got too heartbreaking we had to try and ignore the pain for a second and just... lie there together, mentally exhausted and emotionally overwhelmed. Just as always.
You are too beautiful, and too good to be true. I think i've drained all the love i can ever give all out to you. It's probably not gonna come back, and i'm probably not gonna ever dish out so much ever again. But you are not to blame. it's acquiescent. I'm never tired, never truly sad, never angry, never unavailable, never sick whenever i have to do something to make you happy. but... i was also never myself most of the time.
The change you brought about to me however, was for the better for me. And this i have to thank you so much. Right now, i would die to have you in my arms again. Run my fingers down your skinny frame, feel your cheekbones and watch you flutter those absurdly long lashes of yours. too cute. you'd show me that expression- you know, that one. the one which makes my knees go weak and render me vulnerable.
I'd go on and on. But i know i have to let you go. like, for real. forever. You probably couldn't care less now that you have always had the upper hand in the relationship, and being the strong, practical man you've always been.
I wish you all the best. You probably wouldn't even know this post ever existed. But i am going to spill all these out and that's it. I have to go forward and not look back. not even spare a moment to feel the stab in my heart. Because i guess.. just maybe, now its my turn to let someone else love me... like how i loved you.
And just like how it always ends, I love you baby. So much.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
truth behind letting go.
Halloween! I can't wait. Haven't you guys missed me? Been quite fucked up lately. I mean, what's new? HA HA HA. I will wear the scream mask to work when its the Halloween festival. And hang my spider at the shop!!! HEHEHEHE.
Do you see my dino peeking from the edge of the photo? He is so cute isn't he.
Forever reblog this. HAHAHAHAHAH. Where are you guys going for halloween?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)