MEMORIES, i'd say are the worst nightmares.

You know, many a times i always tell everyone "No, i've never regretted anything in my life." Everyone says its useless to regret. But the fact is that as much as its stupid to do so, it's like a habit you can't kick.

You can't stop saying to yourself "FUCK la, why the fuck did i do this that time? What the fuck was i thinking? " Then you sulk for the whole freaking day. I left him eventually but what he left me was such a deep emotional scar that i need to carry for the rest of my life.

And, the truth is I really can't stop thinking about it. I can't stop calculating how much of my fucking money was stolen when i was at his house. Okay, we all know who are the prime suspects but let's just stfu about it. I can't stop touching those scars on my thigh and think back on how i got it. I look at my phone "to-do" notes and can't stop complaining about the many notes that says "blabla owes you xx$"

BUT what to do i did on my own accord. Oh you know what do I hate the most about it. It's "taking for granted". If there can be anyone who i can just kill now it gotta be her. I've never ever, seen such a shallow bitch in my entire life. Okay but you know there's this phrase called ( direct translation) If the foundation is not straight anything built on top of it will be slanted.

So yeah we are all smart enough to know what it means. Sometimes during rare catch-ups with my friends and then they ask me what happened to "us", my story usually draws all the :O and O.O from everyone. Its so dramatic i can almost go tell JackNeo to make a movie out of it


GOD. i am so disgusted at myself for being so fucking stupid. it was like "pride" was totally scribbled off my dictionary. i don't hate him. Its really amazing how disgusted i am at myself for habouring such immense love for someone that i am blind to what's becoming of me. i heard he's changed for the greater good.
( I am dubious but who the fuck cares ).

I think, i will use SIMS2 to make a story out of this. HAHAHAHAHA, anyone interested? POLL TIME


On a side note, guys from the east are cute. >.>